Put Allyship Practices into Play
Learning Objectives
After completing this unit, you’ll be able to:
- List the four key ally practices.
- Identify strategies for gaining insight into others’ experiences.
- Recognize the value of employing empathetic listening skills.
- Describe actions that demonstrate your presence, engagement, and commitment.
- Explain the impact of speaking up as an advocate for equality.
Our Four Key Ally Practices
At Salesforce, we started a campaign to help educate our employees on how to be open and curious allies. This was in response to the feedback from an overwhelming number of people who said that they would like to help forward the equality movement but were unsure where to start. We worked with our community to distill the steps everyone can take to be an ally into four key practices.
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Ask others about their experiences.
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Listen with empathy to understand different perspectives.
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Show up by being present, engaged, and committed.
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Speak up as an advocate.
Let’s take a closer look at each practice.
Ask Others About Their Experiences
The ally journey begins by asking about others’ experiences with the understanding that it’s okay to be vulnerable and admit you don’t know everything. Start with a sincere curiosity to learn about a community—build an understanding of the lived experiences of underrepresented groups either through having conversations, watching a documentary, or reading a book.
It’s important to note that taking this step does not permit you to put others “on display.” Avoid questions that make others feel uncomfortable, or make them feel like they don’t fit into the environment, either culturally or linguistically (for example, by asking questions such as, “Can I touch your hair?” or “Have you ever thought about shortening your name to make it easier to pronounce?”). Additionally, your questions should never make others feel like you expect them to be the spokesperson for their entire identity group—only ask questions within relationships that feel sincere to both parties.
Finally, remember that these conversations should be a two-way street. When engaging others about their lived experience, be sure to create a safe space that encourages the other party to ask questions as well, and where mutual vulnerability, genuine curiosity, and active listening drive the conversation.
Here are some opening questions to get you started on your journey.
- Can you tell me what a typical day is like for you?
- What can I read or watch to understand your lived experience?
- What makes you feel included and empowered?
- What do you wish I knew about your lived experience?
- What’s the best and most appropriate way I can support you as an ally?
Listen with Empathy to Understand Different Perspectives
After you ask others about their experiences, it’s important to practice deep and empathetic listening. Listen to learn, not to respond. Pause and reflect during conversations, communicate your interest through body language, and ask thoughtful follow-up questions. Practicing active and empathetic listening skills not only helps you internalize what you learn, but it also shows others that you genuinely want to learn from them.
Show Up by Being Present, Engaged, and Committed
After you practice asking questions and listening with empathy, you can begin to understand what action is needed to help move a cause forward and feel more comfortable getting involved. Showing up is an extremely powerful way to demonstrate your support—wherever you are on your journey. Most people are ready and even asking for allies to show up and join the cause. They’ll appreciate the effort and the earnestness as long as you continue to ask about others’ experiences and listen with empathy when you arrive.
Here are some questions to ask to help identify ways to start showing up.
- What meetings or events can I attend to support you?
- What are some causes I can show up to by donating and supporting?
- What time, energy, or resources am I individually putting in to show up for an individual or community that may need my support?
Speak Up as an Advocate
One of the bravest and most effective things an ally can do is speak up for someone. Speaking up can be uncomfortable and even scary. But not speaking up can make it seem like you agree with the injustice or harmful actions around you. When you advocate for issues that don’t directly impact you, you give a voice and platform to those who don’t have one or need their voice to be amplified.
Additionally, you may find that you have access to a platform that a marginalized community or individual may not have access to, and have the opportunity to raise awareness to an issue or cause in that space. Even better, you may find that you can open the door to that space so the individual or community can speak up for themselves. The more voices that speak up for what’s right, the louder the message, and the more others have to take notice. When you’re among a booming chorus of advocates and activists for equality, that’s when you see positive cultural change.
Here are some ways you can use your voice to speak up.
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Restate an idea that wasn’t recognized in a meeting, and give credit to the person who said it.
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Confront a harmful comment by asking the person on the receiving end if they are OK and addressing the speaker by saying something like, “That wasn’t acceptable.”
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Point out an action that discriminates against a community when it happens.
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Speak out about an injustice using your platforms (for example, social media, blog, stage, and so on).
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Propose policy changes within your workplace or society that can create a better environment for all.
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Share your pronouns (in your company directory or org chart, or verbally during introductions) and respectfully use the pronouns of others.
The blog post How You Can Be an Active Ally further explores how allyship is an ongoing learning journey and how to prioritize allyship in the workplace. In the next unit, learn how to take your allyship further by exploring inclusive language.